


It's Never Gonna Be Easy

by Dovahkiin



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Internal Monologue, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-11-19
Updated: 2013-11-19
Packaged: 2018-01-02 00:47:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 554
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1050537
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Dovahkiin/pseuds/Dovahkiin
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sam talks about his life as a hunter.</p>
            </blockquote>





	It's Never Gonna Be Easy

Life as a Winchester will never be easy. You can’t just give up and go home. Hell, we don’t even have a home. Just one crappy motel after the other, following the next job. It’s been like this since we were kids. Always moving, always losing friends. In the end we didn't even bother trying to make friends, or try to work hard at school. Because in the end we’d just be uprooted and move somewhere else. I guess that’s why Dean and I are so close; we’re the only family or friends that we have. There’s no way of escaping who we are. Y’know, _saving people. Hunting things. The family business._

After dad died, Dean took it pretty hard. All his life, he’d been daddy’s little soldier, following his orders. 

“Look after Sammy,” dad would say.

“Shoot first, ask questions later”. 

With dad gone, Dean was lost. He started drinking more and more. Staying out late. Coming home drunk and angry. On these nights, when he wouldn't be home for hours, I’d be so scared. I would be trying to call him on his cell, or checking my watch every five minutes. Every time, I was expecting him to never come back. He was becoming just like dad. But everything changed after he went to Hell and back. Everything changed when he met Castiel. Sure, Dean didn't trust him, especially some guy in a shabby trench coat that kept poppin’ up out of nowhere, but for the first time in forever, there was somebody who finally believed in Dean so wholly and so completely, and who actually stuck around long enough for Dean to finally realise this. The thing is, with our line of work, it’s safer if people don’t hang with us, because, well, they usually end up badly hurt or even… dead. I hate to think about it, and I pretend that it’s not real, but I really think our family’s cursed… Jess, Bobby, Ash, Ellen, Jo, Mum, Dad, Samandriel, Adam, Balthazar…. The list goes on and on. 

So. As time went on, I was realising that Dean finally had someone in his life other than me, who wasn't as likely to die due to the fact that he was an _angel of the lord_. Yeah, yeah, I know. That’s a loooong story. Anyways, I was so proud of Dean, because he was finally starting to be happy again, and if he was happy, then so was I. But, I couldn't help noticing how much more lonelier I felt. I tried ignoring it, but it was always there. So of course Cas noticed (he doesn't really understand a lot of human things, like the answering machine _“I don’t understand, why do you want me to say my name?”_ but damn he really gets some things right), so he suggested for me to meet his brother. But I didn't really expect his brother to appear in the middle of our hotel sucking on a giant, rainbow coloured lollipop. Needless to say I released a very undignified scream, which made him chuckle mischievously and that made me know that I was in for a whole lot of trouble. I've only known him for a month now but he’s hilarious, ridiculous, and a little bit insane, but I think I'm in love with him.


End file.
